Brought to you today by the letter “P” and the number 56


Warning, this post has too much information.  Look away if easily offended or you know me and prefer not to KNOW this much about me.

Sticky goo – and ode to progesterone
 
Progesterone progesterone how I hate thee
The white, pasty crud that gives me baskets of laundry
Why am I doing this my brain says to me?
All for the chance of a take home baby
 
Oh I just put on last night’s jim jams
I don’t know who said that progesterone is from yams
This is more likely descended from cardboard
But a physical reminder of what I’m striving t’ward
 
Ouch, I just discovered a loose hangnail
I swore so loudly I thought they’d take me to jail
Why am I inserting white balls inside me?
All for the hope of a take home baby
 
Progesterone Haiku
Hormone

Corpus luteum

 Day 14 breaks

My heart
 
ABC’s of Progesterone
A
Bloated bout of
Constipation
 
Dried
Every where
 
Flaky
Goop
High      
Inside
 
Killing me softly because my
Lovely lady lumps are
Massively swollen
 
Normal
Over the counter
Prescription? Pshaw!
 
Quietly and
Really carefully, insert
Suppositories whilst in the
Toilet and hope no one looks
Under the stall door while my finger is in my
Vag
Whilst at work!
X rated?
Yes!       Oh well at least it’s not a
Zucchini

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6 thoughts on “Brought to you today by the letter “P” and the number 56

  1. You are hilarious!!! The things we do…but hopefully it will all be worth it in the end!!! You keep on going, girl! Just a few more days until you see a BFP! My fingers are crossed for you that you’ll get the BFP and I can add you to my list of people to be jealous about 😉

  2. That was incredibly creative! Two thumbs up!!! 🙂

    And, well, if someone was weird and looked while you were in the restroom… you could be using those tampons that don’t come with a cardboard or plastic insert…

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